Is there a certain way a relationship should be? Of course that question is not easily answered, because several variables complicate the equation. As many people as you might ask, you would get just as many answers. With Valentines Day just around the corner, what better time to ponder this question?
A recent trip to New England caused me to think about relationships as they should be.
As we drove from Massachusetts to Maine to start our trip and crossed the state line, I couldn’t help but notice the sign:
“Welcome to Maine—The way life should be.”
Now as this was my first trip to Maine, I was curious about what that meant. Surely I now have an idea of the meaning, because everything about the state was welcoming. I enjoyed the scenery, the people, the food, and most of all the tranquil feeling of everything around me. It was a natural paradise. It seemed as if the residents knew what was important in life and were “walking the walk.” I do heartily concur with the sign, because Maine has a great way of life.
The sign made me start thinking about relationships and how they should be. Have you thought about the way your relationship should be? To me, it should be a lot like Maine. A relationship should have beauty, like Maine’s scenery. A great relationship is fulfilling, like the scrumptious food in Maine. An ideal relationship has interactions and support, providing a secure feeling. That’s what I experienced in Maine—an all-over peaceful, content, and safe feeling that this is all one needs.
Take a close look at your relationship and assess its condition.
Does it measure up to Maine? And if not, why?
Ask yourself some questions as you evaluate the interactions you have with your significant other.
- Do you have an open and honest flow of communication? Are you able to converse toward a solution, without falling prey to defensive behavior?
- Do you see the beauty and positive qualities in each other, with an appreciation and acceptance of the unique difference that you each bring to the relationship?
- Do you nurture and support each other as life presents its unforeseen obstacles?
- Are you able to feel safe and secure with your partner without needing to act on pretense?
- Do you make it happen, instead of just talking about what you would like to happen?
The above questions are not the only ones to ponder, but they may help you both to hone in on “the way life should be” in your relationship and provide some food for thought as you look around your surroundings.
Above all, my hope is that you bring a little bit of Maine into your life, no matter what state you now call home.