So, how do you keep your man happy? Keeping your man happy is much like chicken soup for a cold, it’s the go-to treatment. Longevity and happiness in a relationship require just as much nurturing and attention as the common cold. Men are not complex creatures. In fact, women might have that one beat. Men want simple things to keep them afloat and women are just the ones to supply it. The first mistake we make is to assume that our men are as complicated as we are. If they don’t have complex revelations to make or secrets to tell us, we think they must be hiding something. But the average man is baffled when his wife or girlfriend gets suspicious because he isn’t baring his heart to her.
Most men get many of their needs met through their jobs and careers. When a man is successful at what he does, he feels confident and tall. His ego gets stroked many times by people whose good opinions matter to him. When he receives frequent praise in the workplace, the foundation of his identity is made secure. Being a good man is synonymous with having a career and making a success out of it.
But what about when he comes home after a long day at the office and things haven’t gone so well or he’s returning from his third business trip this week and he’s exhausted, stressed, and frustrated? What does he need when work stress is high, or he is in the middle of a big project that he’s having trouble wrapping up? What can you do to keep your man happy?
Men like to feel they are keeping their significant others safe and happy. A smile or a kiss from you is a feather in his cap. There are many ways to show caring, positive emotions that will lift your man’s spirit. I challenge you to find ones that are unique to your special man.
Here are some techniques for shining brightly and bringing your husband or boyfriend into the warm circle of your love and appreciation.
1. It may sound old-fashioned, but greet your guy with a smile, a hug, or a kiss. When he comes home. Make sure he gets a warm welcome. Put aside all the complaints you have been accumulating throughout the day and give him some time to wind down, put his stuff away, change into more comfortable clothes, read his mail, and so on. He doesn’t need is to hear how the kids misbehaved, your bad day at work, or the ongoing honey-do list. Those things can wait until he’s had dinner and can focus on important topics you need to share.
2. We have all heard the cliche, “The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” If you grew up in the fifties, you were frequently warned that it was your job to have a nice, hot meal ready when he stepped through the door. Well—all stereotypes have a grain of truth, and this one is no exception. Feeding him really does have a place in keeping your man happy. Maybe it reminds him of his nurturing mother and all the meals she cooked. In any event, it is worth a try for sure. Of course, these days, you probably have a job of your own. So, I’m not suggesting that it’s always your responsibility to come up with a meat-and-potatoes feast for your other half. The ritual of sharing food with one another gives the two of you a chance to offer to nurture on a real level and also creates a regular time for conversation. In whatever way you might divide up the work in your household, just be aware that being fed is an experience that makes anybody feel loved.
3. Intimacy is another way to show your man he is special. By being vulnerable and letting him into your world, he sees his importance in your life. Tell him you would like his opinion or advice and let him tell you what he thinks you should do about something that is bothering you. Many women talk more intimately to their female friends than they do to their partners. It is not uncommon for a man to feel left out of many aspects of their female partner’s life. Telling him your dreams, fears and difficulties are what intimacy is all about. Your inclusion tells him you trust and value him. Just keep in mind his limited attention span and pick your most important topics first. Most men like to get the facts quickly. They just don’t have the practice you have with heart-to-heart talks that go on the whole evening. But that doesn’t mean he can’t learn!
4. Physical intimacy and closeness are very important for most men and losing a sexual connection weigh heavy on their hearts. He knows that if a woman is sexually attracted to him, life is good, and he is loved. Don’t assume that he knows you think he is handsome. Tell him he is looking especially fine today. “Wear those pants, they make me want to throw you down on the floor.” Telling him he is smart or funny also lets him know he is special in your world. But the big one is letting him know your desire still burns hot for him, and he still has the magic touch it takes to satisfy you. Initiating a physical encounter can be almost as good as the climax of lovemaking. While it’s often customary for men to take the lead in a sexual encounter, most of them really enjoy the occasional role reversal or the times when you make your desire for them known.
Men are visual and can see their mate in ways that the female may not prioritize. So don’t let your physical appearance hinder your sexual demeanor. Weight loss or gain may be troublesome for a woman, but do not withdraw. He sees your beauty in his own way. Stay mindful of his need for closeness as it can bring you and keep you closer.
5. Find one-on-one time so the two of you can be alone together. Make the kids, the dogs, cellphones, and laptops off-limits. Show him that he deserves this time because you need him and enjoy his company. Talk about fun things, your dreams, and future aspirations. Talk about the news or a book you have read. Fantasize about a future vacation spot you would like to visit. Get the drift? Don’t complain about kids, or work, or your in-laws. Take some time to remember why you fell in love, and why you are together. Tell him how he makes your life better and how lucky you are to have him in your world.
I am sure there are many other ways to keep your man happy. Some of the suggestions here might not be for your guy. Just don’t assume that because he has a ring on his finger and comes home to you that you can take him for granted. This list is only a starting point. You can compile your own list of ideas, but some of the things on this list are worth trying. Remember there is no relationship insurance to purchase; you are actually self-insured. It is all in your hands. I’d love to hear your advice on this topic. Share your ideas in the comments.